Friday, May 14, 2010

Doing the 'Na-na.

Seriously, sometimes you Australians drive me to distraction. I mean who plants those ideas in that silly little head of yours? Who owns those papers you people read?
Mark Latham Moment? Get freak'n serious willya. That was like a little kitty-kat playing with a bit of string.

If you want to see a Latham Moment you should have come to the footy with me last week... Not proud, not a pretty sight I confess. Eye-bulging, vein-bursting, face-reddened ranting and spitting chips, and I was only being driven mad by a couple of white maggots, as opposed to being wedged and poked by a pack of people-hating, vengeance-ridden, creation-believing c***s.

Enough unpleasantness, I'm looking forward to this week's game, mainly as I've heard rumour there'll be half-time entertainment featuring a gladiatorial battle between NicNat and JackWatts, followed by a beat-the-buzzer session of It's Academic, between the two (so the school-kid can get some points back) then they'll do a break-dancing comp. Overall my money's on Nic Nat.

I've been trying to get around to organising our Pre-Season PunchDrink. Looks like we may have kinda missed the bus on that one, but I'll get onto a more mid-season one. Stay tuned.

Anyone got any jokes?

Last week's head, and no it's not Craig Easton, earned a fair bit of interest, which just shows that if you want to get people's attention, you'd have to go a long way to beat a good Psycho Cult leader:

Harv: David Koresh, David Parkin, David Schwarz
Nick: Holyhead: David Koresh
Taffa: David Koresh
JOFF: Schwarz, Parkin, Koresh
Corey: David Teague, David Parkin, David Koresh

Let's go with another GrandSunBall comp too this week. You know how it works, send me the co-ordinates of the invisible ball.

The good thing is sleeping giant has awoken and we may have a decent contest this year. VB's dropped off leaving Nick battling on his lonesome, and Harv snapping at his heels. I'm picturing Harv now strapping himself up and rubbing linament in, a la Mickey Rourke in The Wrestler, having one more tilt at past glories.

Drunk on a Ladder Round 7

A new leader this week, with Stanlee nosing to the front in a display of pure guts, just as his Saints drop theirs. Dickwad and Sammy though are the real winners this week, their 7s plucking them from virtual obscurity to contender-ville.

There's more than one way to look at everything, and this week THE EPILEPSIMETER IS BACK, showing the weekly travels of each Drunk.
This kind of thing explains why my eyesight has virtually gone since I started doing this. It comes with a health warning: Only view this chart by putting a pinhole in a box and viewing the projected image, otherwise you may go blind, get epilepsy, go mad or, if you're unlucky, turn to stone.

Another big round in DreamTeamland, where this happened:
Roosters 1,899 def Brennas 1,674
That's Jonathan Brown's boys getting up over Brenna's lads, to stay in touch with the top 4.
South West Norths 1,682 def by The AGE of REASON 1,699
Another 'celebrity coach' besting a local battler in a real close low-scoring tussle, Caro Wilson sending Kurtz's SouthWestNorths' compass in a spin.
TigerBratwurst 1,847 def Barry’s Bustlers 1,495
One for the True Belivers here, Dirk's Snags had more than enough sizzle to fry Barry Hall's Bustlers. He's still winless, which just adds to a less than sensational season all-round for him so far.
TheRuddyNightmares 1,930 def by Champanzees 2,036
Despite both Benny's Nightmares and my Chimps having far too many players in the low-scoring wet game on friday night, this battle was willing and the result was glorious.
punchdrunk 1,466 def by Orange Thieves 1,768
Craig's Drunks just couldn't match it with Joffa's Jaffas, who are sitting nicely within the top 8.
Heylow 1,005 def by Big Bird 1,850
Ian still can't get on the board and coming up against Dean Cox's Big Boys didn't really help his cause. Birds back in the 8 with a nice percentage boost.
Cheesedale 1,992 def catfish 1,823
Cheese served with Catfish. Another couple of quality sides go head to head, with Jim's Cheesies maintaining top possie, and one of only 2 sides undefeated. Coxy's fish just couldn't repeat last week's big result.
pappags 2,073 def JoelCoreyEnright 2,065
The game of the round. 2 teams entered the ring, 2 teams left the ring. When you both get over 2,ooo and win or lose by a measley 8 points.... that's exciting. From memory Sammy's JCE's players finished with monday's game still to play and had to sit back watching Grant's Pappas just reel him in and must have got over the line with 5 minutes to go.

This week: Coupla goodies Caro and Jono have at it, Ruddy's punch it out with Bazza and Cheesdale taken on by JoelCoreyEnright in a quality battle between the CatCoaches.
Roosters vs The AGE of REASON
South West Norths vs Brennas
TigerBratwurst vs Champanzees
TheRuddyNightmares vs Barry’s Bustlers
punchdrunk vs Big Bird
Heylow vs Orange Thieves
Cheesedale vs JoelCoreyEnright
pappags vs catfish