Franco's Big Year continues... The Cup, a G.F. berth for his filthy Pies, as well as for himself in the Drunk Finals. Is there no stopping this man?
It's happened before. Last year in fact, when Sammy, Franco's opponent this saturday as it happens, did the Trifecta with his cats winning the Granny, and Sammy winning the Cup and the GF. Tassy did likewise a few years back from memory.
That's Franco and Sammy morphing it out up there in the header

But let's not get ahead of ourselves the worst hasn't happened, yet.
Down further if you can be bothered there's more from the DrunkTank, and some highly infectious humour...

And just in case you'd forgotten we're only 2 days from the PunchDrunk Night of the Holy Grail. get excited.

In Case of Emergency

Prepare yourselves, there a Jolly good chance the worst will happen on saturday afternoon...
So just in case arm yourselves with these small comedic talismans.
Many thanks to the collectors who have these out on loan, Dickwad and Jimmy Mac.
Many are priceless antiques, all are genuine:

Q. Two Collingwood supporters jump off a cliff. Who wins
A. Society.

Q. What does a Collingwood supporter use as protection during sex?
A. Bus shelter.

Q. What does a Collingwood supporter use as a contraceptive?
A. His personality.

Q. What do you call a 30 year old female Collingwood supporter?
A. Granny.

Q. What do you call a Collingwood supporter in a suit?
A. The defendant.

Q. Why did the Collingwood supporter cross the road?
A. To start a fight with a complete stranger, for no reason what so ever.

Q. What do you call a female Collingwood supporter in a white tracksuit?
A. The bride.

Q. If you are driving and you see a Collingwood supporter on a bike, why should you try not to hit him?
A. It might be your bike.

Q. What's the first question during a Collingwood supporter quiz night?
A. What you looking at?

Q. Two Collingwood supporters in a car without any music - who is driving?
A. The policeman!

Q. Why is three Collingwood supporters going over a cliff in Lexus a shame?
A. Because a Lexus has four seats.

Q. What do you say to a Collingwood supporter with a job?
A. Big Mac please.

You know you're a Collingwood supporter when:

1. A Halloween pumpkin has more teeth than your wife does.
2. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
4. Jack Daniel's makes your list of 'most admired people.'
5. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
6. Someone in your family once died right after saying: 'Hey, watch this.'
7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
8. A ceiling fan once ruined your wife's hairdo.
9. You think the last words of Advance Australia Fair are: 'Carn the Maggies .'
10. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded, right off its wheels.
11. The market value of your car goes up and down, depending on how much petrol is in it.
12. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
13. One of your kids was born on a pool table.
14. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.
15. You think 'loaded dishwasher' means your wife is drunk.
16. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
17. Your front verandah collapses and kills more than five dogs.



A man meets a friend and sees that his friend's car is total write-off and covered with leaves, grass, branches, dirt and blood. He asks his friend "What's happened to your car ?"
"Well," the friend responds, "I ran over Nathan Buckley".
"OK," says the man, "that explains the blood... But what about the leaves, the grass, the branches and the dirt ?"
"Well, he tried to escape through the park."

Q. What do Collingwood fans and sperm have in common?
A. One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.

Q. What do you have when 100 Collingwood fans are buried up to their necks in sand?
A. Not enough sand.

Q. What's the difference between a dead dog on the road and a dead Collingwood fan on the road?
A. There are skid marks in front of the dog.

Q. You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a Collingwood fan. You have a gun with two bullets. What do you do?
A. Shoot the Collingwood fan - twice.

Q. What is the difference between an Collingwood Fan and a trampoline?
A. You take off your shoes to jump on a trampoline.

Q. How do you know if your house has been robbed by a Collingwood supporter?
A. Your bins are empty and your dog's pregnant.

A Collingwood Girl enters a sex shop & asks for a vibrator.
The man says: "Choose one from our range on the wall." She says
"I'll take the red one."
The man replies: "That's a fire extinguisher."

GO SAINTS!

TIME CAPSULE PART 2

BROWNLOW
REALITY: CHRIS JUDD (30 votes)

FANTASY:
Franco: Darren Jolly (3)
Kate: Not Bazza (Not 0)
Rich: Matthew Boyd (20)
Joff: Jimmy Bartel (18)
Grant: boyd WB (20)
Frank: nick riewoldt (8)
Richo: Leonard Hayes (19)
Stoddy: Joel Selwood (21)
Kurtz: Nick Dal Santo (7)
Corey: Adam Cooney (8)
Stan: Brendan Goddard (14)
Dirk: Ryan Griffin (7)
Dickwad: Cooney (8)
Alex: Adam Goodes (13)
Harv: Dan Rich (2)
Jesper: Riewolt (8)
Ando: Corey Enright (3)

Nutshell: I reckon if we'd guessed these yesterday morning there'd still be no-one who got it...

GRAND FINALISTS
REALITY: PIES V SAINTS

FANTASY:
Franco: Collingwood v Bulldogs
Kate: Dogs and Saints
Rich: Dogs v Saints
Joff: Saints v Hawks
Grant: hawks v dogs
Frank: Saints V Geelong
Richo: Cats and Pies
Stoddy: Bulldogs, Geelong
Kurtz: Collingwood v Dogs
Sean: Collingwood v Dogs
Corey: Adelaide v Bulldogs
Stan: St Kilda v Bulldogs
Dirk: Cats and Dogs
Dickwad: Western Bulldogs v St Kilda
Alex: Western Bulldogs v St Kilda
Harv: Western Bulldogs v Lions
Jesper: Cats n’ Dogs
Ando: Geelong v Adelaide

Nutshell: We were all around it, but no-one got there.... Everyone picked at least one top 4 team, more than half picked one grand finalist, none got both.

In Honour of our Co-Champions of Head, there they are sharing the Head-Space up there. Harv and Nick. Congrats chaps.

Last year I forgot to ask. The year before I lost all your answers due to an email malfunction, the year before I probably just did nothing with the answers I got.
This year, I've dug 'em up and will scatter them round.
The first half of your pre-season answers right here. Who says we know anything about footy?

TOP 8
REALITY:
Pies, Cats, Saints, Dogs, Swans, Dockers, Hawks, Blues

FANTASY:
FRANCO: Collingwood, Bulldogs, St Kilda, Brisbane, Lions, Geelong, Hawthorn, Essendon, North Melbourne
KATE: Dogs, Saints, Cats, Lions, Pies, Hawks, Freo, Port
DICK: Saints, Dogs, Hawks, Cats, Pies, Lions, Swans, Dons, Crows
JOFF: Saints, Geelong, Hawks, Bulldogs, Collingwood, Power, Brisbane, Blues
GRANT: Hawthorn saints pies cats lions dogs swans bombers
FRANK: Saints, Geelong, Adelaide, Bulldogs, Collingwood, Brisbane, Essendon, Hawthorn
RICHO: Saints, Dogs, Pies, Cats, Hawks, Lions, Crows, Swans
STODDY: Bulldogs, Geelong, St Kilda, Collingwood, Crows, Lions, Essendon, Hawthorn
KURTZ: Hawthorn, St Kilda, Geelong, Adelaide, WCE, Brisbane
COXY: Collingwood, Dogs, Saints, Hawthorn, Port, Adelaide, Brisbane, Carlton
COREY: St. Kilda, Bulldogs, Adelaide, Geelong, Collingwood, Brisbane, Hawthorn, Essendon
STAN: Bulldogs, St Kilda, Geelong, Hawthorn, Collingwood, Adelaide, Port, Brisbane
DIRK: Cats, Saints, Dogs, Hawks, Swans, Port, Crows and Bears
DICKWAD: Bulldogs, St Kilda, Geelong, Collingwood, Adelaide, Brisbane, West Coast, Hawthorn
ALEX: Bulldogs, St Kilda, Geelong, Essendon, Sydney, Carlton, Hawthorn, Brisbane
HARV: Saints, Bulldogs, Lions, Collingwood, Adelaide, Geelong, Hawthorn, West Coast
JESPER: Cats, Saints, Bulldogs, Pies, Lions, Blues, Crows, Hawthorn
ANDO: Saints, Adelaide, Geelong, Collingwood, Bulldogs, Brisbane, Carlton, West Coast

NUTSHELL: Everyone picked 5 or 6 finalists. Adelaide, Essendon and the Lions were the big disappointments. Only Kate picked Freo.

WOODEN SPOON
REALITY: WEST COAST

FANTASY:
Franco: Tigers
Kate: Tigers
Dick: Tigers
Joff: Melbourne
Grant: Tigers
Frank: Melbourne
Richo: Fremantle
Stoddy: Tigers
Kurtz: Melbourne
Sean: Tigers
Corey: Fremantle
Stan: Tigers
Dirk: Melbourne
Dickwad: Melbourne
Alex: Melbourne
Harv: Port Power
Jesper: Tigers
Ando: Tigers

NUTSHELL: Dees and Tiges? You guys are kidding yourselves.

COLMAN MEDAL
REALITY: JACK RIEWOLDT 78 Goals

FANTASY:
Franco: Barry Hall 83
Kate: Fevola 76
Rich: Jonathan Brown 82
Joff: Franklin 74
Grant: Franklin 108
Frank: Fevola -
Richo: Fevola 87
Stoddy: Barry Hall 87
Kurtz: Barry Hall 87
Sean: Fevola 67
Corey: Buddy Franklin 89
Stan: Buddy Franklin 80
Dirk: Bradshaw 104
Dickwad: Big Bad Bazza 87
Alex: Barry Hall 112
Harv: Fevola 102
Jesper: Bazza 91
Ando: Big Bad Barry 86

NUTSHELL: Big Bad Bazza had a good year, but still let a lot of folks down. 87 is a very popular number. Jack Who?

RISING STAR:
REALITY: DANIEL HANNEBURY

FANTASY:
Franco: NIc Naitanui
Kate: Nic Naitanui
Rich: Dustin Martin
Joff: -
Grant: Michael Barlow
Frank: Rhys Stanley
Richo: Nic Naitanui
Stoddy: Nic Naitanui
Kurtz: Nic Naitanui
Sean: Dustin Martin
Corey: Nic Naitanui
Stan: Nic Naitanui
Dirk: Dustin Martin
Dickwad: Dustin Martin
Alex: Majak Daw
Harv: Nic Naitanui
Jesper: ?
Ando: Jack somebody - Dees

NUTSHELL: Nic Nat is little more than a highly mobile lampshade. Dusty Martin shouldna got rubbed out. Grant's a good judge of Horse-flesh, but didn't read the age rules.

FIRST COACH SACKED
REALITY: MARK WILLIAMS (I'm calling it a sacking)

FANTASY:
Franco: Mark Harvey
Kate: No sackings, but Damian Hardwick will attempt suicide
Dick: Malthouse (quits)
Joff: Dean Bailey
Grant: Neil Craig
Frank: Mark Williams
Richo: Bomber Thompson for a punch-up with Big Gaz re the GC
Stoddy: -
Kurtz: Mark Harvey
Sean: Michael Voss
Corey: Mark Harvey
Stan: Malthouse (quits)
Dirk: No Sackings
Dickwad: Mark Harvey
Alex: Dean Bailey
Harv: Mark Williams
Jesper: ?
Ando: Mark Harvey

NUTSHELL: A coup[le calling for the head of WunderCoach Mark Harvey may have been a little adrift. Harv and Frank have their finger on the pulse. Grant and Coxy showing a little prescience. Matthew Knights musta been looking the goods just a few months back.

That's it.
Beer o'clock.

So here it is:
A draw. Both Nick and Harv got 100% this week so can't split 'em and I hereby give up trying.
Joffa made a lunge at the line with James Manson, A Demon, Charlie Manson. I reckon, even though the shot of Sean Charles was when he was a Saint (which I don't actually remember) he played his good footy with the Dees, I'll pay half a point. Joffa draws for third with Taffa.

And so, just as he has with many folks before us, the unholiest of the holies, Charlie Manson, has finished us off. For this year at least.
This is it:

Apologies for not following through on my well-intentioned ideas last week. Hopefully some Time-capsule stuff this week, but it's the bosses birthday tomorrow and there's all sorts of other shit going on too.
Also we do have a result in Celeb Head, so I'll put you all out of my misery on that at the earliest opportunity too.

To the FINALS:
And then there were 4...
2 Big games to sort out the Grand Finalists.

And here's why...
Dickwad paid the price for being right, but less right than the reckless Matt.
Kurtz paid the price for being even more wrong than Grant.

It's not rocket-salad, but if you can't work out what happens from here, this little chart should give you a hand.

I'll probably pop some more up later in the week, but this is the admin duties done.
Here's who needs to do what this week, and one more FINAL final Head to try to break the deadlock.
I've been out in the garden last weekend digging up the PunchDrunk Time Capsule from under the azaleas so I hope to find time to start drip-feeding that in relevant categories as they come up.
Also had some contributions from various Drunks over the past week or so, hope to get some of that up
And I've had a delve through the PD archives and come up with a fair bit of hidden gold. Keep your eyes out for some interesting pics from the past. Some bad hair. Some hair were there now is none.
Finally, we have about half of the PunchDrunk millions in, so half of you will get a knock on the door around 2am one night this week from a large angry man wearing a stocking. Or if that doesn't work, an email from me.

And don't forget the Final PunchDrink & Prizegiving,
Thursday 23rd Sept. Details next week.

Here are the games and the combatants this week.
Sadly Bern and I were bundled out last week. Kurtz got me with some clever psychological by-play and Bernardo simply failed to deliver against Matt. Matt's in but his dirty Blues are out, Bern's out but his saints are well in. Funny how life's like that sometimes.
Franco and Sammy have earned a week on the golf course while the other 4 sweat it out again this week. Here the grisly details of last weekend.

Overall here's the lie of the land....

I thought this one may have been a good'un. Nicely themed, well resolved, just hard enough.
Too hard it seems.
I'd mainly hoped to get a winner so we could stop this farce. But no, so one more absolute FINAL HEAD this week. If it's a tie, it's a tie.

You see, they're all Rivers...
Both Nick and Harv got Nile, I'd thought it might be gettable from there.
Harv got on the Freds, rather than water sources: Fred Nile, Fred Swift, Fred Fanning.
Nick's too busy being a pitch-bitch to give it much thought, but at least got Fred.

Those who were keeping their eye on the final ups and downs of the Drunk chart during last weekend could have been forgiven for thinking they were on the Scenic Railway. But for the absence of screaming and the presence of airborne kiddie vomit (well, hopefully).
I lost track of who had their nose in front at different stages...

- FRANCO is a Magpies supporter, so bear that in mind when handing out congratulations... Rolled the dice on a Port victory over the Tiges as his break-out game and it worked.
Franco sat 24th at about the halfway mark of the season, so a sensational second half of the year. Unconfirmed rumours have him being seen out and about with Ben Cousins and Travis Tuck, which may explain it...
- Dickwad. The unlucky one. The Rising Drunk Star in his first season. just had to get in front of Sammy and Franco. Just one game. Lost the advantage over Franco when his Tiges lost, but got back on even footing and overtook Sammy by backing the Roos in the last. Fell short by a mere 41 points in margin to Franco over the course of the season. That's less than 2 points a game. Half a point a quarter. That's unlucky.
- Sammy, last year's victor, had everyone chasing him and justifiably went conservative. Didn't work. Dropped 4 games.
- Grant shoved his name right in front of the selectors when his Hawkers upset the popular pies, making him even on points with the top 3, from there on went the popular picks so didn't get there.
- I had to make up 3 on the leaders but had a good margin, second only to Sammy, so was an outside chance. Made my move on Adelaide to beat the Saints, which gave me an extra win, but also the best margin, then picked up the Port win, but blew it by backing my Dees.
- Matt, needing to make up 2, and a fair bit of margin, made life tough for himself picking his Blues at Subi, as we know they fell an agonising (for Matt) 6 points short. Not much for after that, made some amends by picking the Roos against the flow, but ended up even on 5.
- Bernie had 3 to make up to but had a huge margin against him, Picked up the Hawks and the Port win. Not enough.

So well done Franco. We'll grab the Cup back from Sammy, give it a good wash and scratch your name in it again.
Oh... and hand over roughly 1,300 smackers.
Well played. Hope your team loses.

There'll be more later in the week to finish up the PunchLeague, the Head, money, the Drink and anything else we've neglected. Finals details are just down below though.

No sooner do we finish mains and desert arrives. But alas, not for all.
The Top 8 Drunks move through to the PunchDrunk Finals. For a mere $10 extra, they have the chance to pick up the winner-takes-all $80 for the GF winner.
It follows the same McIntosh-Duckworth-Maguire-Goldspink formula the league follows so it's pretty unstraightforward, as follows:

We need a winner, and a margin in your designated game. As always picking a winner takes precedence over the margin. Please note whether you need top give an odd, or even margin.
I'll contact each of the 8 who'll give me their secret guess by Friday.
As I'm up against Kurtz, we'll each give our tips to a trusted independent panel of Drunks, before revealing them top each other. Just need to find someone's who's trustworthy.

UPDATE:

Dispatch from D-Day
Dateline: Dawn, D-Day.
Never before in the anal of PunchDrunk History has such a situation situated itself such.
Here we sit just 2 games from the end of the home-and-away season, 2 games from the end of PunchDrunk proper for 2010, and no less than 5 Drunks can win it. 4 with a good chance, and one who's totally kidding himself.
Grant's put himself way back in contention, and through a heady combination of luck, wisdom and pig-headed loyalty nabbed the result of yesterday's knife-edge Hawks v Pies melodrama. Now we have not three, but 4 Drunks nestled together on 118, Sam's still out in front, Franco, Dickwad and Grant trailing only through inferior margin-calls.
Exciting? Tell me about it.
You'd have to think it all hinges on who does what in the very last game of the season, the twilight game, the toss-up game at the G between the Dees and the Roos. It's a day of chances, guesses, second-guesses but no second-chances.
Like a game within a game, like a wheel within a wheel, like a hotdog in a bun, like a hand in a rubber glove, like a finger in your ear-hole, the machinations are as endless as this sentence appears to be... will it ever end? The psychological by-play is as important as the game itself.
Go forth unto battle chaps, where only the Drunkest may prevail.

p.s. Was anyone else mortified to receive the 16 pages of magpie filth delivered to their bedside inside the Age yesterday morn, in lieu of the Good Weekend? Excuse me but what the fuck was that all about? Those c*nts don't need any more encouragement, or free advertising features. Made a good bin-liner at my place. At least the Hawks improved the weekend for most of us a few hours later.

Drunk on a ladder. Round 21.

Holy FREAKIN fre-jole... Too close to call here too!
Well looky here. One round to go. THREE Drunks locked together on 114 (last years champ, Sammy, the winner from '07 Franco and new boy Dickwad). Looks like a well-hung parliament of Drunks. Of course Sammy has the benefit of a much lower margin total than the other two, 71 points over Franco and 123 over Rich. I can't see that being turned around this week so they'll have to overhaul him with an extra win.
One point behind these three is Grant, another former winner, and a further point behind is Matt. In the event of a huge upheaval, one point further back, your's truly, Coxy and Bernie may not be too far off, and make up the 8 on 111.
It looks like it may all come to margin difference....

This time last year Sammy sat third and jumped both myself, in second, and the very long-term leader Craig to snatch it in the final round.
Hold my hand darling and let's take a walk down Memory Lane...
And here's the current Eye-Chart.

Good luck to all. May the Most Drunk Win.

PunchDrink
A small but chummy turn-up for last week's drink. A little like the crowd at a Port Adelaide or North Melbourne home game, except we weren't surrounded by ass-holes.
And I know we've just put one out, but we have a date for the Big PunchDrunk Night of Dreams Presentation and Pie Night. Nothing but the date yet, but put this in your Filofaxes: Thursday 23rd September. That's the Thursday before the Granny.

Money
It's coming in, dribbling like your grandpa when you feed him his mushed liver and peas, but still some more to come in.
I'll be nagging those who haven't, til they have, on a weekly basis.

It seems everyone's been holding their breath in excitement at the deadlock in Celebrity Head. I thought everyone had turned blue and passed out, but at the death we have some late postal votes and votes from some outer booths trickling in...

Nick's just bobbed up with Mark Ricciuto
Harv said: Mark Ricciuto, Dean Soloman and St Frank Thring.

So that's one each for our leaders. Yet another deadlock here

The notion of Australia's first saint, Frank Thring and Celebrity Head terrify me somewhat, but oddly seem to go together like hand in leather glove.

This week's Head is the last one, so make it count.

Sadly, nothing really matters here any more.
Somehow we all managed to contrive a Grand Final play-off between two outsiders, high profile outsiders to be sure, but definite ring-ins.
So Dean Cox's Big Birds go at Jonathan Brown's Roosters. Who cares?
I nominate Jim Richo's Cheesedales as Domestic Champions, edging out the Chimps in taking out the minor premiership, scoring the highest no of points througout the season and finishing next best in the finals to this stage.

Still life here though. Given the dire situation in the top half I won't poop on the party and point out that Dirk and Grant are battling out a grand Final for 9th and 10th. At least they are One Of Us.
Go on boys, make us proud.

The Drink
So don't forget the Drink is on tonight (Thursday) at the Union Club, cnr Webb and Gore st Fitzroy. 7pm-ish.
Hope to see a bunch of yas.

Drunk on a ladder. Round 20.

So just when things were starting to look a bit settled, when it looked like a battle to the death looming between two Drunks, we get one of those rounds... suddenly things have changed a tad.

Firstly, the jackpot has gorn orff. Franco and your's truly hung on for 8s to finally split the bucks. Not sure yet how much that is, can't remember when the last one went off but it's been a while. Couldn't happen to two nicer guys.

The result is that Franco is now overall leader, and I'm suddenly in the top 8.
So now there are 5 Drunks separated by just one point. 3 all banged up on 108, and two, including Sammy who has the best margin score of the bunch, one point further back.
Coxy and I are 2 further back, and personally I'm smelling blood. Well smelling, anyway.

Some say cream rises, others might point out that shit floats.
Whatever, we have the past 3 winners in the top 8.

All tied up here too, the Holy Head, obviously was old Aztec God Quetalcoatl, god of civilisation and learning. Partnered with him, the ultimate civilised footballer, former Demon, current board member (points there for a start), merchant banker, AND here's the clincher, he' married to a ballerina. And also, Mr Clever, Rhode Scholar, AFL Chairman the most learned man in the Southern Hemisphere, Mike Fitzpatrick.
I say again. I never promised a link between the heads, so even a crap one is a bonus.

Both the leaders had a go, both picked 2 outa 3.
Harv: Mike Fitzpatrick, Patrick Dangerfield? Quetzacoatl.
Nick: Fitzpatrick, Quetzacoatl, Koschitszke.

Whoever let bloody Dean Cox and Jonathan Brown into the comp should be kicked out.
Well actually he just was...

So now it’s down to last year’s runners-up the Cheesedale boys, ably sired by the Big Cheese, Jim Richo, and the other local lads, Sammy’s JoelCoreyEnrights, to do the right thing and see off the interlopers. Carn PussyBoys, lets have a local Grand Final.

In the bottom half, 2 close games, but Dirk's Snags had too much sizzle for the Brennas, and Joffa's boys knocked Craig out.

Welcome to the Idiocracy

I've got this great idea. Let's build a new utopian society.
Lets take all the greatest traits, current or historical from the vast pantheon of human endeavour. The greatest philosophies and achievements of mankind, of Earth, nay The Universe.
We could sample aspects of the Glories of Ancient Greece, Rome, take the best from The Renaissance, select elements from the Age of Enlightenment. Hell there may even be some positive bits we could copy from the Post-War USA.

Nah, I've got a better idea, let's look to Western Sydney for inspiration and direction.
Excuse me, what the fuck is going on in this country? Has anyone actually been to Western Sydney? Has anyone sampled the intellect out there? Has anyone FOUND any intellect out there?
It seems every thing these days is designed and made for these arseholes. These Ozzie Flag-Draped Bogan Racist quoits.

Socially we have 2 options, take these unfortunates and bring them up to our level, or Succumb to the Dumb and join them in society's gutter.
Politically, well pretty much we're doomed anyway, but PLEASE don't encourage these scum by sitting at their feet begging for their approval...
And now Footy is enlisting a bunch of thick-bodied, thick-headed, rugby-shaped chunks of thug to change our game to appeal to these cavemen (yes, even their women are cavemen). You mark my words, it'll end in tears for all of us and our beautiful game.

I have this other idea, lets bring in the Boat People these cro-mags fear so much and do some kind of prisoner exchange. Sweep the streets and suburbs west of Parramatta (and most of it to the east too for that matta) and pop those West Sydneyians on the boats and send them to Nauru. They'll probably like it, I think they play Rubgy League there and it's made of shit.

PunchDrink #2
It's been weeks since the last one, so this Thursday August 19th lets do it again, a wedgie before the final one.
The easiest thing is to do a re-run of the last one, The Union Club Hotel in Fitzroy at 7pm, but if anyone's got a seriously better idea pop us a line via email, or the Comments button down there. I will send a specific Drink email soon, but put it in your books.

Drunk on a ladder. Round 19.

Looking more and more like a battle of two tipping titans by the week. Young Brenton fell on his own sword somewhat this round, crucially and foolishly tipping with the heart in the Dees and Tiges game. Still close for the minor placings, but without looking at all the forthcoming fixtures, it could be a matter of waiting for one, or both Dickwad and Grant to stumble.
At the moment Dick's holding sway with a margin 90 points better than Grant, you'd think Grant would have to best him by one game to get over the top. Among other things, it's going to be interesting to see how the Tiges, Hawks, Hearts and Heads perform over the next 3 weeks.

Looking the Madness Chart, there's a lot of stability toward the top, 4 geezers who must have sudden self-belief in making the finals at least, and a few who would have some nagging self-doubt. You know who you are.